I think back to where I was a year ago at this time. I was, more than likely, sitting in the doctors office, hooked up to the NST machine as I was at every visit. I was probably getting ready to be sent down for an Ultrasound or maybe bloodwork. My doctor was wonderful. I credit him and his staff with Noah being here today.
It is hard to believe that in just a little over a month, Noah will be one. My little 5 pound baby boy is now a mobile, talking and cracker eating toddler. I look at him, and I remember so clearly the fear that I felt when I heard the words "he isn't growing". I remember the panic in the doctor's voice as he ordered me to the hospital...NOW. I remember his first cries. How it felt to hold him.
As my brother prepares to be a dad for the first time, I am slowly preparing to leave behind the baby years...for good. There will be no more OB appointments, no more midnight runs to Wal-mart for diapers or formula. No more rocking a fussy baby for hours on end. There will no longer be a tiny little baby in this house.
For the past three years, I have had three babies back to back. There was always a baby to be tended to...and now? Well I have four independant children now. Damien will be 8 this month, Aidan will be 4 in July, Morgan 3 in August, and Noah 1 in June.
Am I going to miss that time? The time when all Noah wanted was to be held as I fed him instead of now crawling off on his next big adventure? Of course. It was during this time, with all my children, that I learned what it meant to be strong. I learned how a simple gesture as a smile from a baby can reduce an adult to tears. It was during this time that I was tested.
So, as my brother braces for sleepless nights and endless diapers, I will kiss Noah good night and hug him extra tight. I will tell my children that I love them. I will tell them thank you for making me a better me.
I will usher out the baby years for good, never forgetting the memories, as we eagerly move forward in to more wonderful memories.
Congrats Matt and Tiffany! Having a baby is the biggest blessing of all....