I am starting to think I may be certifiably insane...

I do alot. Between being a mom of 4 crazy kids, running a house, cleaning said house, paying the bills, I also work from home as a freelance writer and sometimes photographer (thats changing...) I have a to-do list 6 pages long (and no I am not kidding) and yet, here I sit adding to it.

I hate not having anything to do. I can't just sit and watch t.v. I have to be writing, or reading or just...something. I am always in constant motion it seems. Even at night, while the rest of me is trying to decompress, my mind is going "ooohhh I can do this!" and "That is an awsome idea" which usually leads to me laying awake most of the night. I. can't. sit. still.

I think part of the reason that I have so many things that I want to do or am doing is because for the first time in years I am finally recoginizing that my dream of being a wahm is really a reality now. I am excited because I did this...I did it on my own, with little to no help. There were times (and, though, he won't admit it, now too) that my husband doubted that I could ever make this work...yet here I sit.

So, why might I be certifiably insane?

Because in addition to the loads of work that I already have, I have no less then six projects I plan on starting (hopefully within a months time).

And yes, it may seem like alot...and I am sure it is. But that is how I roll.

I like being busy. I like having things to do.

I like the excitement that I am feeling right now at the endless possibilites that are before me.

I like knowing now that I can do this. I like being able to believe in myself and my abilities. Being able to believe in me is empowering...because I know that even if no one else does...I do.

So, certifiably insane? Perhaps.

So incrediably blessed?

For sure!!

2010 Resolutions...

I got the idea for this post from Brandy at Happily Blended (you should stop by and say Hi!!)

In just about 29 hours (I am in CST here) 2009 will be gone. But certainly not forgotten. And we will be welcoming in a brand new year. well I might be sleeping at that point....

I always set resoultions for myself. And I always ditch them. I have never seemed to be able to find the "resolve" to stick with the resolutions I have made as the new year rolls in. I guess, for me, making resolutions is just one of those things that you feel like you have to do just, well...because.

That is not the case for 2010.

After taking stock of things that happened or did not happen in 2009, I have realized that it is time to "own" what I say. No more empty "this year I am gonna...." Nope. This time I am going to hold myself accountable.

So, just what are my resolutions for the new year?

*I want to be more organized. Seriously, having to hunt for tennis shoes 3 minutes before the bus comes for Damien...so not cutting it any more (and while I am at it...I am going to start making his lunches the night before..no more rushing)

*I want to take better care of ME. Moms as a whole, tend to put themselves on the back burner. I have always done that. Not because I had to, but because I feel that, as a wife and wahm, that I should be putting the kids and my husband first. I have totally negelcted to take care of me. So, starting in the new year, I am going to get my dental work done, get my ear fixed and find out why I am exhausted all the time, yet cannot sleep. I am also going to loose weight...and lots of it. (more on that in a later post)

*I am going to take my business to the next level. I am blessed, that after months of searching and countless tears, that I have found a great fit for me. It is enabling me to work at home and make a good chunk of change. My goal is to be able to replace my unemployment that runs out in a few months.

* I am going to make it a point to post here more. I love my blog. I love the connections I have made with my blog. I am going to be more "socially active".

One of the biggest resolutions that i have for 2010 is that I am going to work on my marriage. Over the last year, my husband and I have had some huge fights. Mostly about stupid things. Our marriage shows signs of the battles we have waged against eachother. Starting now I want to work on making things right. I love my husband. I don't want to imagine life without him.

2009 has been both good and bad. But I wouldn't change the experiences for anything.

What will your resolutions be in 2010?

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